A Memory Of A Cold Day In January
On my oldest sister’s wedding day,
one of the groomsmen begins to share one of his firefighter stories with the
audience. As he was sharing his story, the story brought me back to an incident
when I was young girl. This particular day happened in January 2001, a day my
family never forgets.
Driving from home having a cast removed, I
remembered my mom got a call from my dad telling her something happened to the
house. My dad told my mom that my oldest sister set fire in the kitchen by
accident. My sister was trying to create wax candles and left the wax too long
on the stove, a fire broke out! Of course, my parents were a bit upset but
thankful that nobody was hurt.
Walking around the water slogged floor,
I could see and smell the damage from the fire. I noticed the fire completely
destroyed the kitchen and it spread to the dining room. Fortunately, my parents
were able to get the kitchen and other damages fixed. I remembered my mom asked
my dad to renovate the kitchen and add wooden floors since my mom wanted them
for a long time. My dad granted her wishes with a smile.
Years later, my sister met and fell
in love with a firefighter/emergency medical technician much to my family’s
amusement. Back to the groomsman’s story, to my sister’s surprise and horror
and the audience’s laughter, he revealed that he was one of firefighters that
help save our home that cold January day. My family especially my sister
is now able to laugh and remember the fire as a fond memory that my family shares
together.
(278 words)
We are able to see the
positive comes out of the negative.
I like the way you tell the story but I think there could be a smoother transition between the groomsman at the wedding and the story as a whole both at the beginning and the end. It seems a little too abrupt when you say "Back to the groomsman's story." Though maybe that's just me. :)
ReplyDeleteI think you could take out the part about the cast, but overall it is very well written.
ReplyDeleteI love your choice of a story and it is very entertaining. I also like how you started out positive, became slightly sad/negative, but explained how that created a more positive event. Some of the language could be worded a little differently and some information is not needed for the story, ie the cast, but good story.
ReplyDelete